An Off-Topic Vent: I Need a Job!!!

Today, I applied to a bunch of jobs I'm over-qualified for, which most likely pay less than I was making at my last job. They might even pay less than I'm getting from unemployment. And the saddest part is I probably still won't get calls from any of them. I also applied to some jobs that I'm probably under-qualified for, 'cause what the fuck, why not? The worst they can do is not call me.

I know I haven't been at this too terribly long, but I'm already frustrated, and feeling like I'll never find a job that's not in sales. Just to be clear, I'm not trying to switch fields. I have NO sales experience at all, but I get calls or emails to interview for sales jobs almost daily. They clearly don't care about experience. And I definitely do NOT want to do sales. I don't have a sales personality, and I don't want my salary to depend on whether or not I can talk people into buying things they probably don't need in the first place. I just don't know how to do that. No offense to salespeople. If you can do it, more power to you. It's just not for me.

And my other gripe about looking for a job? Three little words: Bachelor's degree Required. It doesn't matter if your Bachelor's degree is in Chemistry or History or French... just as long as you have a degree. That drives me insane. What part of being an disaster recovery coordinator or administrative assistant or customer service representative will be helped by a Bachelor's in Fine Arts? Shouldn't my many YEARS of experience mean a whole lot more than whether or not I've finished college yet?

Siiiiiiiiiigh.

Anyway, in much happier news, my weigh-in today shows that in two weeks, I've lost 11 pounds. Incredibly pleased about that, and still not at all bored with eating this way. The only thing I really miss is fruit, but it'll still be there when I'm ready to eat it again :)

Hello, Ruby Tuesday

Weekends are always challenging when one is trying to adhere to an eating plan. Even when you're unemployed, and weekends have slightly less meaning.

Friday night, my boyfriend and I went to Ruby Tuesday.  I'd been to there with my mom and brother a week or so before, and was thrilled at all the low/no carb choices, so this seemed like a great place to go for dinner.  Plus he got a 25% off coupon in the mail, which just sweetened the deal.

Ruby's is my favorite of the chain restaurants, and has been for quite a while. One reason for this is their amazing salad bar. They also have a spicy queso dip that's out of this world.  Of course, no queso and no tortilla chips would be had during this visit, but I don't feel like I missed out at all.

We both got the salad bar, of course.  Even late on a Friday night (about 80 minutes before closing), everything was fully stocked and fresh.  Four varieties of lettuce, tomatoes, cucumbers, chick peas, hard-boiled eggs, onions, peppers -- all the usual things, plus 4 or 5 pasta or potato salads, some with meat.  And although I didn't have them, I can tell you from previous experience that their pumpernickel croutons are great.

I was initially thinking I'd get a burger (they do have very tasty burgers, too), but since there are several barbecues coming up in the next few months, I went for something fancier -- a rib eye steak.  I'm normally a little apprehensive about ordering steak in a restaurant that doesn't specialize in steak, fearing it will be overcooked.  Luckily, my rib eye was almost perfectly medium rare, and didn't have much fat.  For my sides, I chose grilled green beans, and mashed cauliflower.

Mashed cauliflower, by the way, really is a godsend for a potato junkie who is on a low-carb diet.  Yeah, it's not potatoes, but it's a damn close facsimile.  Ruby's mashed cauliflower is pretty good.  I think Houlihan's is a bit better, and my own is the best ;)

My boyfriend got Trout Almondine (which he raved about), also with mashed cauliflower, and zucchini.  I tasted the zucchini, and it was very good.  Buttery, almost.  My grilled green beans were grilled too long, unfortunately, but by that point I was too full to really care.  I'd had plenty to eat.

The other sides offered were great -- sugar snap peas, asparagus, roasted spaghetti squash, broccoli... plenty for those not eating carbs.  They even have a spaghetti squash entree, with a red pepper marinara sauce.  I'm very curious about it, but haven't tried it yet. I'm sure I will at some point soon.

Our delicious dinner came out to only 35 bucks after the coupon.  Can't beat that!  It's so nice to be able to go out to dinner and not feel like I'm altering everything I ask for to suit my diet.

Ruby Tuesday at Willowbrook Mall gets 8 out of 10 on my restaurant rating scale. Not stars... forks or spoons, maybe?

“I'm frightened of eggs, worse than frightened, they revolt me.” -- Alfred Hitchcock

Here is my biggest complaint about the Atkins diet:  breakfast.

Think about what your breakfast choices might be when you remove carbohydrates and sugar...

Cereal? Out. Waffles, pancakes, french toast? Out. Fruit? Nope. Yogurt? No, that's out, too.  So what does that leave?

Eggs. Fucking eggs, over and over again. Fried eggs, mostly.  Sometimes for a change of pace, maybe hard boiled eggs (when I don't forget that I'm making them, that is, and they haven't exploded in the pot because all the water burned off...).  Just eggs, that's it. Yeah, you can get fancy and make crazy omelets every morning -- but let's be honest, I'm not a morning person, and no matter how much I love cooking, I don't spring out of bed with a frying pan in my hand... not to mention the fact that no matter how much cheese and vegetables you throw in, THEY'RE STILL EGGS.  You can make bacon with them, or sausage or ham, but damn it, they're still eggs.

One day into the diet, I texted my boyfriend, "I'm already sick of eggs."  The truth is, I generally like eggs, but wow, when I have them a few days in a row, bleh!  He recommended just skipping breakfast, but I tend to wake up hungry, so that doesn't work for me.  I had to find another breakfast idea.

I scanned the web, and found that Atkins makes shakes.  Many flavors of shakes, in fact.  And they are on the acceptable foods list for Induction.  I ordered an 8-pack of strawberry shakes on Amazon for 10 bucks, and got 2-day free shipping with my Amazon Prime.

I wasn't home when the first delivery was attempted, and a signature was required, according to the note left on the main entrance to my small building (only 6 apartments).  The next day, I was home all day long, waiting for the 2nd delivery attempt.  I specifically stayed home so I could accept the package.  And the hours went by... the whole damn day -- nothing.  I checked the status online, and saw that a second attempt was made, and they would try again Monday.  Siiiiiiiiigh.  No one came to my door.  No doorbell ringing, no knocking.

Anyway, the next day, my boyfriend and I were in Stop & Shop, where I noticed they had every flavor of Atkins shakes -- at $6.49 for a 4-pack.  More expensive than Amazon, but they were right there.  So I bought  3 flavors:   Dark Chocolate Royale, Cafe Caramel, and Mocha Latte.

To call these shakes is kind of a misnomer.  They're more like a thicker chocolate milk.  The Dark Chocolate is quite good, though sweeter than I expected.  Same for the Mocha.  I haven't tasted the Caramel yet, but I'm expecting it to be sweeter than the others.

Monday, even though I was home, I left a note for UPS on the downstairs door of my building, basically saying, "PLEASE come to apartment door. I AM HOME!"  And finally, after 7pm, there's a knock. I open the door, and the guy just hands me the package and walks away. He didn't ask for a signature!  Grrrrr!

I threw them in the fridge and had one the next morning.  Mmmmm!  The strawberry is my favorite, hands down. It's thicker than the others, too -- more like an actual shake.

All of the flavors have a decent amount of vitamins (just gravy on top of what I'm getting from food and my daily multi), plus 15g of protein, which is great.  They are tasty and filling, and a good breakfast.  And they're saving me from eating eggs, so... I couldn't ask for more :)

Exersucks

When I first joined Esporta (which is now called LA Fitness Signature), I was crazy about it. I couldn't wait to get there. It was brand new and everything was so nice. Great equipment, towel service, big spa showers with shampoo, conditioner, and body wash provided. Oh, and a lap pool and jacuzzi. That was a big selling point for me. While gym shopping, that was on the top of the list – I needed a gym with a pool.

I went to the gym, as I said in my previous post, at least 4 times a week, for at least an hour at a time. Cardio upstairs first, then weight machines downstairs, then a shower before heading to school or over to my boyfriend's place.  It was crazy -- I finally really liked working out, for the first time ever in my life.

This went on for quite a few months. It was the most dedicated to exercising I'd ever been. And then... well, I don't know what happened, really. I just kind of stopped going. Not tapered off, but just totally stopped.

And now, for months, I've been paying almost 60 bucks a month for a gym membership that I'm not using. Yeah, there were cheaper gyms, but none of them had a pool... oh, and guess how many times I used that pool when I was going to my gym? If you guessed not one single damn time, you are absolutely right.

So I'm looking for a new gym now. I've frozen my Esporta membership while I search, just in case I don't find a new (cheaper) one I like. (If I quit outright, and then decide I want to rejoin, I'm afraid they'll hit me with enrollment fees again).

Top of the list right now is Retro Fitness, at a nice, manageable 20 bucks a month. And there's a brand new one in Secaucus, not far from Esporta. I'm also looking at Quest Fitness on Rt. 17, because it costs the same as Retro. Anyone have any experience with either of these gyms? I don't think Quest is a chain, but I know Retro is.

 Within the next week, I'll be taking advantage of free passes to each of gym and will report back on my findings. 

Atkins as a Way of Life?

I am now on Day 10 of this foray into the Atkins Diet. This is not my first time at the rodeo. Back in 2005, I took this diet on for the first time. For 4 solid months, I stayed on the hardest part of the plan, the Induction Phase, which is typically only adhered to for the first two weeks. 

It was the first day back to work after 4^th of July weekend when I started. My goal was to stay on until Thanksgiving. Thanksgiving would be my reward for all those months of suffering, and I would gorge myself on mashed potatoes and pies and all manner of yummy carby goodness.

People who'd done the diet before told me that my carb cravings would go away after two weeks. And to my complete surprise, they actually did! I couldn't believe it.

The other surprise after those first 2 weeks? I was down 14 pounds. A pound a day. I'd never had that kind of success on any other plan – and believe me, I'd tried a boatload of diets, having battled with weight issues pretty much all my life.

I never cheated on Atkins. I had this irrational fear in the back of my mind that any deviation from the plan would somehow make all the weight come back overnight. The only treat I had in those 4 months was a handful of a child's size popcorn at the movies (the movie was Poseidon – I needed something to make it bearable). And what was my prize for all of my hardcore sticktoitiveness? I lost 45 pounds. I was skinny! Okay, not super-model skinny – which I wouldn't want to be and never could be – but I was buying size 6/8 pants and skirts... and even got into a size 4 here and there. It was amazing. I'd never been that thin in my life.

I held on to one pair of jeans to remind me of where I started – before Atkins, before Richard Simmons (my diet before Atkins, on which I lost about 30 pounds over a long period of time). My heaviest was close to 220 pounds. After Atkins, I was at 145. Those jeans I kept? I think they were a size 18 or maybe even 20. I don't have them anymore, but I still remember how it felt holding them up, looking at them, at that weight. Just mind-blowing.

Years went by, and I more or less did Weight Watchers – sometimes hardcore, sometimes wasting my money paying for something I wasn't doing. My laziness gave me about 15 pounds back over the years... and then I quit smoking. Oh boy. I had no idea how much smoking affected my metabolism, but it clearly did. And some more pounds came back. And then a few more. Ugh.

I joined a gym. For a while, I was going to the gym at least 4 days a week – often more. It didn't seem to be making any difference on the scale. I felt stronger, and good about myself, but I was only maintaining, or at best showing tiny losses.

A couple of weeks ago, I decided that before things get completely out of control again, I'd go back to Atkins. When I told my mom, she asked if I was going to stick to this as a lifestyle, and I started thinking... I am a carbohydrate junkie, there's no question about it. I love my pasta, my bread, my pizza, and oh my God my potatoes. There's probably nothing I love more than potatoes, food-wise. And those are the foods that are usually my downfall. Granted, if you eat too much of anything, you're going to gain weight (in the end, it all comes down to calories, no matter what plan you're on). But I'm certainly more susceptible to over-indulging when it comes to carbs. 

Last week, during my first week back on Atkins, I realized I feel more energetic than I have in a long time. I just generally feel better. And that's when it occurred to me that maybe I shouldn't just think of this as a diet. Maybe I should think of it as a lifestyle change. If I actually go through the phases this time (as opposed to last time, when I stayed on Induction the whole time), I think I could make it work as my way of life.

My first weekly weigh-in shows I'm down 7 pounds. I know it won't go as fast this time as it did last time, and that my metabolism is slower since I'm older and not smoking anymore, but it was a good first week!

Taking it one day at a time... I'll be wearing those 6/8s again someday soon :)

Will you walk into my parlor?

Hello and welcome, friends.  I don't know what this will turn out to be, overall, but for now it's mainly going to be about my experiences with food and weight.  So many of us struggle with this pain in the ass problem every single day, and I personally find that it helps to write about it.  Most days, I assume my entries will be about that.  Some days, it may be about good wines we've found.  Could be about a concert, a trip, some stupid thing that happened at the grocery store, my idiot cats -- who knows?  Whatever it is, I hope you enjoy it.  Thanks for reading :)